What Happens When You Let Go of “Should”
Discover the transformative effects of releasing the word 'should' from your life and mindset.

In today’s fast-paced world, the word 'should' often permeates our thoughts and conversations, dictating how we perceive our lives, our achievements, and our decisions. We frequently find ourselves saying, 'I should exercise more,' 'I should eat healthier,' or 'I should be further along in my career.' This seemingly innocuous word carries the weight of expectations, guilt, and comparisons that can severely affect our mental well-being. But what happens when we begin to let go of 'should'? This article explores the profound impacts of releasing this word from our vocabulary, reshaping our mindset, and paving the way for a fulfilling life.
The Nature of 'Should'
The word 'should' often represents external expectations. It signifies societal norms, family pressures, or self-imposed beliefs about what we ought to be doing or achieving. When we constantly measure ourselves against these standards, we might cultivate feelings of FOMO (fear of missing out) or inadequacy. The issue lies in the fact that these 'shoulds' rarely align with our true desires, leading us to pursue paths that may not resonate with our authentic selves.
Breaking Free from Expectations
Letting go of 'should' opens up avenues for liberation and self-acceptance. Instead of engaging in a never-ending cycle of obligations, we shift our focus to what we genuinely want to do and achieve. This liberating mindset encourages introspection; we start asking ourselves, 'What do I want, rather than what do I think I should want?' This shift is profound, as it allows us to own our choices and embrace our individuality.
Shifting from Guilt to Intent
One major impact of releasing 'should' is the transition from guilt to intention. When we let go of external pressures, we can replace feelings of obligation with a sense of purpose. For instance, instead of saying, 'I should go to the gym,' we might begin saying, 'I want to go to the gym for my health and happiness.' This change in language fosters a positive frame of mind and encourages actionable steps toward our goals without negative self-talk.
Improving Self-Compassion
Removing 'should' from our lives also enhances our ability to practice self-compassion. We recognize that everyone’s journey is uniquely their own, and it is okay to not meet every single expectation we set for ourselves. When we stop berating ourselves for 'not doing enough,' we create space for grace and kindness in our self-talk. This self-acceptance can lead us to pursue our passions with vigor rather than dread.
Enhancing Productivity and Creativity
When we let go of 'should,' we often discover newfound creativity and productivity. Freed from the constraints of imposed expectations, we are more likely to explore new interests, engage in experimentation, and pursue creative outlets. This unification of intent and desire can lead to profound discoveries both personally and professionally. By allowing ourselves to create and innovate without the fear of inadequacy, we become more productive and fulfilled.
Fostering Authentic Connections
As we begin to prioritize our own desires over societal expectations, our relationships often benefit, too. Letting go of 'should' fosters authenticity, encouraging us to be genuine in our interactions. This authenticity allows for deeper and more meaningful connections with others, as we can better articulate our needs and desires. Furthermore, when we acknowledge our own journeys, we become more empathetic towards the journeys of others, fostering a sense of community and understanding.
Creating a New Narrative
As we explore the idea of letting go of 'should,' it's also essential to consider how we can create a new narrative for ourselves. This narrative should be centered around acceptance, choice, and empowerment. Instead of feeling trapped in a web of social compulsion, recognizing our autonomy can provide greater satisfaction in decision-making processes. We can actively choose paths based on passion, enjoyment, or curiosity rather than obligation.
Embracing Imperfection
Allowing ourselves to release 'should' encourages us to embrace imperfections. Instead of adhering to ideal standards, we should rather accept that life can be messy and unpredictable. This acceptance can lead to a more positive outlook as we recognize that growth is often accompanied by failures and setbacks. By becoming comfortable with imperfections, we pave the way for resilience and adaptability in the face of life’s challenges.
Mindfulness and Presence
Letting go of 'should' invites mindfulness into our daily lives. We become more attuned to the present moment—no longer burdened by what we think should happen, but rather accepting and engaging with what is happening right now. This presence can cultivate a greater appreciation for our experiences, subsequently enhancing our overall happiness. By being mindful, we allow ourselves to experience all facets of life more richly, rather than living in regret or anxiety about unmet expectations.
Conclusion: A Path to Empowerment
In conclusion, the act of letting go of 'should' can have transformative effects on our lives. From fostering self-compassion and authenticity to enhancing creativity, mindfulness, and deeper connections, this process is about reclaiming our agency and celebrating our unique journeys. It starts with small changes in the language we use and the expectations we set. When we shift our mindset and prioritize our genuine desires, we cultivate a life in alignment with who we truly are. Embracing this journey toward self-discovery and acceptance is ultimately a powerful step toward living a fulfilling life—free from the confines of external expectations and filled with the joy of personal growth.